marshmallows

For the past few months I've been fascinated by the study of EQ - Emotional Intelligence.

EQ is the measure of your ability to manage emotions rather than the opposite way around and all the textbooks seem to conclude that one's EQ is often far more important in determining success in life then IQ.

I've also come to recognize that despite trying to grow my EQ...i am probably going to eat the marshmallow everytime. Let me explain.

The marshmallow epxeriment is a famous 1960s experiment where psychologists tested four year olds. They interviewed the children individually and offered them a choice. Either they could have one marshmallow now, or if they waited until the tester had run an "errand," they would get two. Impulsive children would grab the marshmallow as soon as the experimenter had left the room. Others played, sang, or used other distractions to get the reward of two marshmallows fifteen or twenty minutes later.

After fourteen years, the psychologists tracked the children and tested them. The differences were insane and basically go like this:

Eat the marshmallow = failure, pathetic, loser

Sit on your hands and wait and get two = successful, confident allstar

For more descriptive (and less jaded) results click here: http://www.kaganonline.com/KaganClub/FreeArticles/ASK14.html

At any rate..I am trying to pay closer attention to my marshmallow threshold and see if i can change my ways...but who is kidding who....if marshmallows tasted like brussel sprouts or were fat, balding and had zero personality....I be a rocket scientist - and an emotionally stable and aware one at that.

text messaging

Until now, I have been a complete texting moron - unable to write anything longer then 4 words and averaging about 7 minutes to type those said 4 words.

Last night I finally figured how how that "smart text" function works..phew.

It's amazing the role that SMS has taken in my life and in the lives of those around me. It's the new dating tool. No longer do we phone and set up dates (or heck, even email) instead, after meeting someone new, flirtatious texts are exchanged for a given period and will eventually either lead to a date being set up or it falling by the wayside.

Since when did having an actual conversation when 'dating' become so 'outdated'?

When it seems the last thing we want to do is actually talk to someone when getting to know them, I am curious about the effect this is having on our ability as a society to communicate effectively and intelligently. It's completely changing the way we socialize and interact with those around us.

When the very tools and pieces of technology that are supposed to help us better connect to the world around us actually make it quite possible to go days without ever actually speaking to another human being, how is that for advancement and innovation?

winter

I like to think that i'm someone who loves living in a country that has four seasons. I say it's because it 'makes you appreciate each one all the more'.

After what has been a brutal introduction to winter, and only hinting of what lies ahead - I'm pretty much onside with sunshine, heat and even humidity 365 days a year.

And fuck do i regret not holding out for a condo with underground parking.

stoked.

A part of me wishes I did a trip like the one i just did ages earlier but think if I had, i wouldn't have reaped the same benefits. At any point before in my life, I think life was still too raw for me to truly get outside of myself and my head, and enjoy the moment i was in - to not worry where it fit in the greater scheme of things.

I met great people, unengaging and dry people and people I won't see or talk to again but appreciated the time we shared. I met people I hope will grow
to be a part of my life in some way..a penpal or lifelong friend, only time will tell.

There was also the requisite 'vacation crush'. An intriguing and charming combination of 1 part lawyer, 1 part surfer and a 100% free and endearing spirit. And those eyes.

I am proud of every single nick, cut, scrape and bruise I came home with and am even more proud (though still embarrassingly horrified) when I watch the video of my efforts to catch a wave and ride the line. I challenged myself physically and as I think about it more, mentally and emotionally too. As someone who at some point in her life developed the bad habit of bailing when things got tough, i somehow managed to avoid doing so this time around.

so stoked. so utterly stoked.

air canada

It infuriates me endlessly that Air Canada, and i'm sure all other airlines, do not have a single guilty or remorseful thought over throwing out all those 'used' headsets after each flight.

I recognize amid all of the physical torture our darling planet is enduring - global warming, the pollution of our waterways and the destruction of our greenspaces to name but a few, that this complaint is really really really trivial. But infuriates me all the same.

I'm curious when the day comes, after we've completely destroyed the earth and everything on it...and life once again miraculously regenerates..what the archeologists of the new world are going to make of all those damn earphones.

things I learned in costa rica

1. rainy season does in fact, mean rainy season.
2. windproof does not mean rainproof.
3. monteverde coffee rocks.
4. i'm allergic to rainforests.
5. in surfing and in life, it seems that wherever you point, is the direction you'll go.
6. moments don't last but the experience always will.
7. walking on the beach at night is cliche...but i love it anyway.
8. Lonely Planet guidebooks are not conducive to "pura vida".
9. i love who I am..the darkness, light and everything in between.
10. i didn't need the hairdryer after all.

dilemma

In packing for my trip to Costa Rica, a backpacking style adventure spent mostly in rainforests and at the beach learning to surf, I find myself amusingly torn....

Hairdryer or no hairdryer?

The internal debate continues....

so many books, so little time...

While making stops in at the library and used book store today, once again I felt this wave of what I can only label as mild stress, when realizing there is so much knowledge, information, ideas and stories staring back at me that I will never consume.

Of course the 2-3 books I did pick up might not quite make such as fantastically wise dent in that mission should I ever choose to accept it....

• Shopaholic takes Manhattan
• A Girl's Guide to Fishing (which is supposed to be quite good)
• The Bell Jar (this one i picked up so i didn't feel quite so.....plastic)

what is it with this onslaught of chick lit??

at any rate, I offer no apologies for my latest selection which will accompany me on my trek around Costa Rica over the next few weeks. I figure that while lying in a hammock after a day of surfing, i deserve a bit of trash reading.

call when you get there

My mother was the type who couldn't sleep until she heard the lock click, signalling my return home (most likely drunk and doing my best not to stumble about and give myself away). My parents were also the type who always told me to 'call when i got there'..wherever there happened to be.

I'm not sure when they stopped needing the calls of reassurance or if they merely bite their tongues now, but I recognize that the task of relinquishing the overwhelming need to ensure the safety of one's children, and replacing that instinct with a blind trust and faith in the world that surrounds them, must be one of the most difficult things to ever have to do.