Night of Dread

This weekend in Dufferin Grove Park, a very unique space in Toronto with a vibrant community and personality all of its own, there will be a Night of Dread parade where participants are invited to dress up as what 'fears you most' to 'parade it, mock it and dance it'.

As I drove to work, I pondered how I might visually intepret some of my greatest fears.

...never finding true love or perhaps just real and meaningful love.
...leaving this world with regrets
...the day when I become the caregiver to my parents
...public speaking
...not following my dreams
...never figuring out what my contribution to this world was meant to be
...failing to take chances
...drowning
... not being able to dance with my dad on my wedding day, either because he isn't there or because that day never comes
...the adrenaline overload I experience popping up on a surfboard or trying to initiate that damn toeside to heelside turn on a snowboard

Not that i'm going to this parade of weirdness, but if I did, maybe i'd just dress up like a great big cockroach instead.

Careful what you wish for

As a bit of a restless soul (job hopper for the less romantic) I've generally been the type to meander and fall into things, rather than move with purpose through life.

It would seem that anytime I've set out with some said purpose, I seem to be end up at my most miserable.

Currently I am not that restless, not that miserable, but still seem to enjoy imagining myself wandering down a myriad of different paths, for I've realized, the grass will forever look greener on the other side.

A recent tiny bout of career fidgeting lead me to investigate the possibility of a"secondment" opportunity - basically a foreign exchange for adults. I go pretend to work in another country for a period of time and someone comes here to play about in my life.

I found out today our London office is interested. My boss is supportive. I probably, most likely, will actually now have to go.

Priorities

Finding that it is becoming increasingly more difficult to make it to a spinning class after work, this morning I was all set to go to a 6:30 one.

I suppose it was more of a case of my alarm being set rather than me. I am pretty sure that deep down I actually had no intention at all of hauling my ass out of bed. I mean really, what good can come of exercise at that ungodly hour?

Increased metabolism throughout the day?
More energy?
A free and clear schedule to do a myriad of other things I want to get done?

Yes...perhaps those things.

he made me buy my own balls

tonight i went on a second date. i think i knew on the first date it wasn't going to go anywhere, but given we had a mutual friend, i thought it best I investigate a bit further rather than tossing him to the curb - which I seem to do more frequently than not.

The number of unsuccessful matches over the past year or so is not lost on me. I do know that I either have unachievably high standards or likely perhaps, some sort of mental block against nice, cute, intelligent, normal, available men. I see my friend E tapping her nose and pointing at me over the admission of the latter.

anyway, it's 8:30 (PM) and i'm home from my date which started at 4:30 at the driving range, at which, he made me pay for my own balls.

and dinner

and oh, drinks and dinner on the first date too.

I am all for going dutch or trading off and I don't expect the man to pay for everything, but not once, on either date did he at all offer to get the bill. Not even the typical "you get it the next time" which if I actually do have a 'next time', gladly keep my end of the bargain.

Of course if I was interested in him, this all might not have bothered me that much...but given I ALSO WALKED HIM HOME...it really does.

uncle nutbar

My dad's side of the family has always been a bit peculiar. A recent email from my uncle Brian exemplifies this peculiarity to the nth degree....

PENNY’S PROGRESS - Updated after Addenbrooke’s visit on 27th Sept 2006.

Since the 22nd Aug 06 appointment with Dr Clatworthy (works in Dr Pritchard’s clinic), an all day appointment (0800hrs until 20.00hrs) was booked for 1st Sept 06 for more blood tests, a scan and a biopsy. On that day scan revealed no physical abnormality (blockages, stones etc). Biopsy done at 1400hrs (had to take two samples a first was not successful).

27th Sept 06, 1530hrs appointment, doctor stated that the result from the biopsy was that medication had caused the kidney malfunction. Cannot qualify which drug it was that caused the problem. Dr asked for another blood sample and has booked another appointment for one month’s time in case. Meanwhile Addenbrooke’s will write to our GP (copy us the letter), which should state what has happened. If blood levels are OK, the one-month’s time appointment will be cancelled.

In summary she is feeling a lot better than she was which confirms what the blood levels have indicated.

Compiled by BC